What a psycho. I do believe someone should let the Delaware health system know of this woman since she indeeds to do patient care.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Isn't this what contradictory
to the Zombie laws of it's only entertainment? Wouldn't Cindy call this taking stuff offline?
What a psycho. I do believe someone should let the Delaware health system know of this woman since she indeeds to do patient care.
What a psycho. I do believe someone should let the Delaware health system know of this woman since she indeeds to do patient care.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
"Who Knew that the Zombies Pay Dues?"
(Written 12/30/10 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders Blog)
My sources deep within the Zeeke Cult recently provided me with the poop on what the Zombies have to pay for being in the Zeeke Cult.
It doesn't seem like much at first glance, but the aggregate totals are impressive. Their dues come in several parts.
1. $1.00 an hour for being active in the room, up to a maximum of $7 per day.
2. A flat $50 per month. (There are ongoing discussions about $200 per month "Gold Key Memberships.")
3. A $1.00 surcharge on each drink at designated "piss drunk" events.
4. An offset of $1 for each disparaging comment posted on this blog about me, Bob, Bonnie, or RedSky (5 word minimum; maximum of 5 comments per day).
The fascinating part is where those monies go:
1. The $1.00 per hour while active in the room goes entirely to Zeeke. While that may not sound like much, if all the Zombies are fully active every day, it would work out to $20,440/year. It also explains why he doesn't have time for a real job. But unfortunately, the total pay for him for 2010 was just $12,500.
2. The flat $50/month is for "Miscellaneous Expenses," which so far has been used solely to pay off Zeeke's legal bills. (You didn't buy his hooey about the NRA footing the bill, did you?)
3. The drink surcharge is split evenly between Zeeke and Ham so they can get "piss drunk" for free.
The offset for nasty comments on this blog has become a growing problem because of the recent enormous increase in them. Some Zombies have figured out that if they just type a few moronic words every now and then while Zeeke's on another mind-numbing rant they can substantially reduce their bills.
The discussions at Cult meetings about fees and expenses have become heated at times. At one, for example, the hostilities started when Zeeke said he wanted to upgrade from 7-11 Game Day beer to Olde Frothingslosh ("the pale stale ale"). Ugly allegations about "living in the lap of luxury" were hurled about. Zeeke's usual "But *I* am The Man!" mantra was met by Ham's "BlahBlahBlah," which caused Zeeke to throw a hissy fit and storm out in a huff.
So, basically, Zeeke's AOL Job pays $12,500 per year plus FREE BEER and no legal costs. Not bad pay for cussing all day long at Bonnie and Guy! But it also means that Zeeke may have to get a REAL job to maintain his rather minimal lifestyle unless the Zombies up the ante. Til then, he'll have to continue to wear those mortifying green muscle shirts to nightclubs.
My sources deep within the Zeeke Cult recently provided me with the poop on what the Zombies have to pay for being in the Zeeke Cult.
It doesn't seem like much at first glance, but the aggregate totals are impressive. Their dues come in several parts.
1. $1.00 an hour for being active in the room, up to a maximum of $7 per day.
2. A flat $50 per month. (There are ongoing discussions about $200 per month "Gold Key Memberships.")
3. A $1.00 surcharge on each drink at designated "piss drunk" events.
4. An offset of $1 for each disparaging comment posted on this blog about me, Bob, Bonnie, or RedSky (5 word minimum; maximum of 5 comments per day).
The fascinating part is where those monies go:
1. The $1.00 per hour while active in the room goes entirely to Zeeke. While that may not sound like much, if all the Zombies are fully active every day, it would work out to $20,440/year. It also explains why he doesn't have time for a real job. But unfortunately, the total pay for him for 2010 was just $12,500.
2. The flat $50/month is for "Miscellaneous Expenses," which so far has been used solely to pay off Zeeke's legal bills. (You didn't buy his hooey about the NRA footing the bill, did you?)
3. The drink surcharge is split evenly between Zeeke and Ham so they can get "piss drunk" for free.
The offset for nasty comments on this blog has become a growing problem because of the recent enormous increase in them. Some Zombies have figured out that if they just type a few moronic words every now and then while Zeeke's on another mind-numbing rant they can substantially reduce their bills.
The discussions at Cult meetings about fees and expenses have become heated at times. At one, for example, the hostilities started when Zeeke said he wanted to upgrade from 7-11 Game Day beer to Olde Frothingslosh ("the pale stale ale"). Ugly allegations about "living in the lap of luxury" were hurled about. Zeeke's usual "But *I* am The Man!" mantra was met by Ham's "BlahBlahBlah," which caused Zeeke to throw a hissy fit and storm out in a huff.
So, basically, Zeeke's AOL Job pays $12,500 per year plus FREE BEER and no legal costs. Not bad pay for cussing all day long at Bonnie and Guy! But it also means that Zeeke may have to get a REAL job to maintain his rather minimal lifestyle unless the Zombies up the ante. Til then, he'll have to continue to wear those mortifying green muscle shirts to nightclubs.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
"Confession is Good for the Soul; Lying Isn't"
(Written 12/27/10 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders blog)
In addition to whatever moral problems lying causes, its practical effects are obvious. No one believes you later when it's important to you that they do.
For example, last night in the room Cindy admitted to lying about the whole Bob and Facebook thing. When I called her on it, she tried to weasel out of it but really just affirmed it. There was no "whoops, I didn't mean THAT" or other feeble attempt at denial, just the reflexive "don't speak to me" mantra.
If Cindy wants to see where lying leads, just look at Zeeke. He lies frequently, badly, and without remorse. So, of course, no one now believes anything he says about anyone.
And no one's fooled by "I swear on my life (THIS time)" oaths. We all read Aesop's "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" fable when we were children.
Cindy32863: OK> I have to admit something
Cindy32863: some already knew this
Cindy32863: umm I was NEVER one bob's FB...not did ANYONE I know go on his FB>>I just wanted to watch him make a fool of himself LOL
TheZeekEffect: lololol..
Cindy32863: and he did it SOO well = )
TheZeekEffect: it worked
Cindy32863: and that I swear on my life = )
RUFFSTUFFROB69: cindy your the laughing stock
Cindy32863: lmao NO BOB. that would be you dear
Cindy32863: you were played..and played oohhh soo well
Cindy32863: lmao
ChristopherK2: Cindy--So, essentially, you lied?
RUFFSTUFFROB69: yes she lied and that's ok chris
Cindy32863: or am I lying now?
Cindy32863: the world shall never know = )
ChristopherK2: We just know that you lied, then or now?
Cindy32863: K2..seriously. go play on the little blog and dont speak to me
In addition to whatever moral problems lying causes, its practical effects are obvious. No one believes you later when it's important to you that they do.
For example, last night in the room Cindy admitted to lying about the whole Bob and Facebook thing. When I called her on it, she tried to weasel out of it but really just affirmed it. There was no "whoops, I didn't mean THAT" or other feeble attempt at denial, just the reflexive "don't speak to me" mantra.
If Cindy wants to see where lying leads, just look at Zeeke. He lies frequently, badly, and without remorse. So, of course, no one now believes anything he says about anyone.
And no one's fooled by "I swear on my life (THIS time)" oaths. We all read Aesop's "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" fable when we were children.
Cindy32863: OK> I have to admit something
Cindy32863: some already knew this
Cindy32863: umm I was NEVER one bob's FB...not did ANYONE I know go on his FB>>I just wanted to watch him make a fool of himself LOL
TheZeekEffect: lololol..
Cindy32863: and he did it SOO well = )
TheZeekEffect: it worked
Cindy32863: and that I swear on my life = )
RUFFSTUFFROB69: cindy your the laughing stock
Cindy32863: lmao NO BOB. that would be you dear
Cindy32863: you were played..and played oohhh soo well
Cindy32863: lmao
ChristopherK2: Cindy--So, essentially, you lied?
RUFFSTUFFROB69: yes she lied and that's ok chris
Cindy32863: or am I lying now?
Cindy32863: the world shall never know = )
ChristopherK2: We just know that you lied, then or now?
Cindy32863: K2..seriously. go play on the little blog and dont speak to me
Sunday, December 26, 2010
"Sometimes they open their mouths simply to change their feet."
(Written 12/26/10 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders blog)
I had the following exchange early this morning in the room with Alan and his bride, Perky. I'll give them credit for being rather quick at changing their stories. And Alan wisely shut up and let Perky try to defend him.
Xalan39o3x: k2 farts cum
ChristopherK2: Oh, so Alan's the Zombie who posts on the blog. I wondered...
Xalan39o3x: i never blog
Xalan39o3x: must be another fan
Perkyonex2: (((((((((((((((((((((((( Honey FONT))))))))))))))))))))))) stop blogging
Perkyonex2: but I love you anyway
ChristopherK2: "I never read the blog. I just comment on it, critique it, etc."
ChristopherK2: (Did Perky just rat out her hubby?)
Perkyonex2: No..I just went with the flow of conversation....and if YOU say he's blogging ..he MUST be bloggin
ChristopherK2: Surrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre...
ChristopherK2: Nice backpedal...
Perkyonex2: I don't backpedal
Perkyonex2: I just go with the flow
ChristopherK2: Right...
I had the following exchange early this morning in the room with Alan and his bride, Perky. I'll give them credit for being rather quick at changing their stories. And Alan wisely shut up and let Perky try to defend him.
Xalan39o3x: k2 farts cum
ChristopherK2: Oh, so Alan's the Zombie who posts on the blog. I wondered...
Xalan39o3x: i never blog
Xalan39o3x: must be another fan
Perkyonex2: (((((((((((((((((((((((( Honey FONT))))))))))))))))))))))) stop blogging
Perkyonex2: but I love you anyway
ChristopherK2: "I never read the blog. I just comment on it, critique it, etc."
ChristopherK2: (Did Perky just rat out her hubby?)
Perkyonex2: No..I just went with the flow of conversation....and if YOU say he's blogging ..he MUST be bloggin
ChristopherK2: Surrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre...
ChristopherK2: Nice backpedal...
Perkyonex2: I don't backpedal
Perkyonex2: I just go with the flow
ChristopherK2: Right...
Friday, December 24, 2010
Helping those who seem hopeless to help
Written 12/22/10 by RedSkyBay for the Uglier Marylanders Blog)I was in the chat room one evening and gave Cindy some good, sound advice. It seems Cindy is going to give her toddler grandson a puppy for Christmas. A puppy as a plaything, can you imagine? A puppy is a living, breathing creature, with feelings. Most anyone that has an ounce of sense knows the worse time to give a puppy as a gift is at Christmas. Call any shelter, they will tell you that their shelters fill up not long after Christmas, because the novelty of the puppy wears off. The puppy has accidents on the floor, needs attention, and then there are Vet bills.
And a puppy for a toddler? A toddler has no sense of responsibility. A person with any intelligence would wait until that child was old enough to learn responsibility. Then, if he or she showed that responsibility in his parents eyes, let him have a puppy, he earned it. Puppies get seriously injured every year by small children that don't understand that they are not toys.
As if that wasn't bad enough, there was another roomie that saw the pictures of the puppies, (we will just call her Poison Hemlock) and said she wanted a certain one by just looking at a picture. So much for meeting the puppy, seeing if they connected, and checking it's personality. Or seeing if that particular breed of dog fits into the Family's lifestyle. I will never understand the lack of intelligence some people show. It just sickens me to read stories of why so many dogs are in shelters, and the lack of consideration from the people that put them there.
Anyway, back to my story. Cindy was so angry and humiliated when I made a comment about the puppies, she went off on me. Calling me this name, that name, anything she could think of in her moment of rage. A few minutes later, Ruffstuff asked me if I saw the pictures of his dogs. When I replied I had, Cindy's sick brain went into motion. Cindy thought to herself...hmm..I bet RedSky saw Rob's pictures on his face book page. That had to be it!
So, Cindy desperate to get even an ounce of dirt on me after she was humiliated in the room, made up a fake Face book account, hoping I was one of Rob's friends. She made the persons occupation as that of a Trucker. (I'm trying not to laugh here, but it's hard.) Cindy, and her squirrel of a friend under Cindy's instructions, then invited Ruffstuff to be their friend under the brand new alias name, to get access to Rob's friends and their information. Cindy had it all figured out in her demented mind.
You were WRONG again Cindy. Imagine that!
As a friend of mine often says after visiting the room, "THOSE PEOPLE NEED THERAPY!"
Merry Christmas Cindy.
DOINKKKKKKKKKKKK!
The names used in this story are fictional, even though it would be hard to convince anyone with intelligence that they aren't.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
"An Intervention for Zeeke"
(Written 12/15/10 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders Blog)
Zeeke's family and his one friend staged an intervention after Thanksgiving dinner because of their concerns for... well, themselves. This intrepid reporter was given a recording of the event by an anonymous source ["Bean Spiller" Beth].
Zeeke's Mom: Billy, there are a few things we've gathered together here to discuss with you. We love you, but we're deeply concerned with some parts of your life.
Zeeke's Brother: Why the fuck did some AOL woman mail ME a package with a frickin' liver inside of it??? WTF is WRONG WITH YOU!!!
Z's Mom: Now, now, we agreed to remain calm.
Z's Mom: Billy, one of our concerns is that people from AOL are coming after US because of their hatred for YOU. Who is this Bonnie person?
Zeeke: She's just another "AOL Victim" who can't take a joke. She's seriously nuts.
Z's Brother: Joke??? You've been verbally abusing her for almost 10 years, according to Christopher, and...
Zeeke: Christopher? You know ChristopherK2???
Z's Mom: Yes, we had lunch last week. He seems like a very nice man, very smart, and quite the gentleman. Nice teeth, too.
Zeeke: That ##$%& is a @#$&* faggy jooboy.
Z's Uncle Abraham: I beg your pardon!
Zeeke: Oh, sorry Uncle Abe, I forgot you were here.
Z's Mom: Where'd you learn THAT language!!! And who is that man who called me looking for you?
Zeeke: He's just another AOL Loser with a criminal record of nine felonies, mostly for beating up people and firearms violations. He's spent several years in prison and...
[Note: Zeeke's Mom faints. As Beth is helping to revive her, the discussion continues.]
Z's Brother: Now LOOK what YOU have done to Mom! We both know that I can beat your ASS, and trust me, I will unless...
Z's Mom: Stop it, boys. I'll be okay in a few minutes. Billy, we've been watching you on the widget for a few weeks and...
Zeeke: The widget?!?!?!
Z's Mom: Yes, that nice Christopher gave us the... what's it called... the link. It seems that every thing he has said about you is true.
Zeeke: If I ever see that @#@$#$%, I'm gonna...
Z's BFF Beth: Oh, stop that, Billy. Everyone knows that you're harmless and just full of hot air.
Z's Brother: I was amazed at how much time you spend talking in that chat room, at least five hours a day. What happened with your job?
Zeeke: Due to the tough economy, I was cut back to part-time about 18 months ago. I only work from 9 p.m. to midnight three nights a week.
Z's Mom: So, you didn't really need all that money I've given you because you knocked up a couple of girls?
Z's Brother: Mom!!! Watch your language!
Z's Mom: Oh, sorry, one too many eggnogs...
Z's Brother: And why haven't you gotten another job? I bet you could've found a good one IF you didn't spend so much time on AOL!
Zeeke: Bite me, "not so big" brother!
[Note: A brief fight ensues, Carlton pounds Billy to a bloody pulp, and Billy's tied to a chair and gagged.]
Zeeke's BFF Beth: Listen to me carefully, BillyBOY. You're killing my rep in the room. If you don't straighten up and soon, you ain't touching THIS ever again. I can always go back to Prancer, ya'know. And HE can dance, instead of whatever it is you do that looks like a headless frickin' chicken on uppers!
Z's Brother: And IF I or anyone else in the family gets another body part in the jail or another phone call from an AOLer, trust me, YOU will be VERY sorry "little" brother.
Z's Mom: Billy, really, we all love you and want what's best for you in life. But you're putting all of us in danger with your stupid AOL crap. You NEED to quit all that ugliness on AOL. Try being NICE instead, like Christopher. AND you NEED to get a REAL job. IF you don't do those by the end of the year, I *will* cut off your money.
[Zeeke's family and Beth then turn and leave in a huff. But they forgot one thing...]
Zeeke: mmmmmmmmmffffffff...
Note: This article is purely fictional, and any resemblance between names used herein and real people is purely intentional... errr... coincidental.
Zeeke's family and his one friend staged an intervention after Thanksgiving dinner because of their concerns for... well, themselves. This intrepid reporter was given a recording of the event by an anonymous source ["Bean Spiller" Beth].
Zeeke's Mom: Billy, there are a few things we've gathered together here to discuss with you. We love you, but we're deeply concerned with some parts of your life.
Zeeke's Brother: Why the fuck did some AOL woman mail ME a package with a frickin' liver inside of it??? WTF is WRONG WITH YOU!!!
Z's Mom: Now, now, we agreed to remain calm.
Z's Mom: Billy, one of our concerns is that people from AOL are coming after US because of their hatred for YOU. Who is this Bonnie person?
Zeeke: She's just another "AOL Victim" who can't take a joke. She's seriously nuts.
Z's Brother: Joke??? You've been verbally abusing her for almost 10 years, according to Christopher, and...
Zeeke: Christopher? You know ChristopherK2???
Z's Mom: Yes, we had lunch last week. He seems like a very nice man, very smart, and quite the gentleman. Nice teeth, too.
Zeeke: That ##$%& is a @#$&* faggy jooboy.
Z's Uncle Abraham: I beg your pardon!
Zeeke: Oh, sorry Uncle Abe, I forgot you were here.
Z's Mom: Where'd you learn THAT language!!! And who is that man who called me looking for you?
Zeeke: He's just another AOL Loser with a criminal record of nine felonies, mostly for beating up people and firearms violations. He's spent several years in prison and...
[Note: Zeeke's Mom faints. As Beth is helping to revive her, the discussion continues.]
Z's Brother: Now LOOK what YOU have done to Mom! We both know that I can beat your ASS, and trust me, I will unless...
Z's Mom: Stop it, boys. I'll be okay in a few minutes. Billy, we've been watching you on the widget for a few weeks and...
Zeeke: The widget?!?!?!
Z's Mom: Yes, that nice Christopher gave us the... what's it called... the link. It seems that every thing he has said about you is true.
Zeeke: If I ever see that @#@$#$%, I'm gonna...
Z's BFF Beth: Oh, stop that, Billy. Everyone knows that you're harmless and just full of hot air.
Z's Brother: I was amazed at how much time you spend talking in that chat room, at least five hours a day. What happened with your job?
Zeeke: Due to the tough economy, I was cut back to part-time about 18 months ago. I only work from 9 p.m. to midnight three nights a week.
Z's Mom: So, you didn't really need all that money I've given you because you knocked up a couple of girls?
Z's Brother: Mom!!! Watch your language!
Z's Mom: Oh, sorry, one too many eggnogs...
Z's Brother: And why haven't you gotten another job? I bet you could've found a good one IF you didn't spend so much time on AOL!
Zeeke: Bite me, "not so big" brother!
[Note: A brief fight ensues, Carlton pounds Billy to a bloody pulp, and Billy's tied to a chair and gagged.]
Zeeke's BFF Beth: Listen to me carefully, BillyBOY. You're killing my rep in the room. If you don't straighten up and soon, you ain't touching THIS ever again. I can always go back to Prancer, ya'know. And HE can dance, instead of whatever it is you do that looks like a headless frickin' chicken on uppers!
Z's Brother: And IF I or anyone else in the family gets another body part in the jail or another phone call from an AOLer, trust me, YOU will be VERY sorry "little" brother.
Z's Mom: Billy, really, we all love you and want what's best for you in life. But you're putting all of us in danger with your stupid AOL crap. You NEED to quit all that ugliness on AOL. Try being NICE instead, like Christopher. AND you NEED to get a REAL job. IF you don't do those by the end of the year, I *will* cut off your money.
[Zeeke's family and Beth then turn and leave in a huff. But they forgot one thing...]
Zeeke: mmmmmmmmmffffffff...
Note: This article is purely fictional, and any resemblance between names used herein and real people is purely intentional... errr... coincidental.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
"Taking the Paranormal Out for a Spin"
(Written 12/3/10 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders Blog)
My gene pool includes a few steps into the paranormal, mostly telepathy and such. My particular talent is suggestive thought-casting. I won't bore you with the "how" details, but basically I mentally send suggestions to do something to people, and surprisingly often they comply.
So, I decided to trot out my skills and test them on some of Zeeke's Zombies. Starting a few weeks ago, I occasionally suggested to some of them that they use some of MY thoughts about Zeeke in their constant attacks on Bonnie, Guy and others. I Zombiefied the Zombies.
The best results follow. The effect was strongest on Ham, probably because of lingering ties created during our prior friendship. Or maybe because of her obviously weakening relationship with Zeeke due to the whole dust-up over Pretty's party.
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