"Lifelong Friendships"

(Written 3/1/11 by ChristopherK2 for the Uglier Marylanders Blog)

As I pondered joining my fraternity 44 years ago, the phrase "Lifelong Friendships" barely even entered my thoughts. The brothers had heavily promoted it to us, but I was--like most 19-year-old guys living far from home--mulling over the much more important factors of beer, women, sports, parties, more women, etc.

But this past Saturday night, I was at my fraternity's annual dinner in Newark, DE after an absence of a few years. And after nearly a lifetime in it, the phrase now has great meaning to me.

I was always very involved in my fraternity beyond the parties and such. I met my first true love thru it... Cheryl. It gave me a good background for the job world. And I met so many good men. One of them is in the picture below on the right, with me, taken Saturday night.

Erv was a year younger, and from "lower, slower" Delaware. Despite our many differences, we became good friends. When I became President of the chapter, he was my treasurer and we both worked tirelessly at it. (He still calls me "my president," which always chokes me up a bit.) We worked closely together over the years on the fraternity including: attending a national convention in Vail, CO and regional ones (I was the District President); reforming the chapter when it had some serious problems; and serving on the house corporation to provide them with good housing and on the alumni association to raise funds.

We otherwise traveled entirely different paths in life. I was gallivanting all over the place looking for Idontknowwhat, while Erv stayed home in Delaware. He married his fraternity sweetheart, raised two wonderful kids, and established a good career in accounting. Erv has always been a good and decent man, and worked hard at life. That's the best thing I can say about another man.

Over the last couple of decades, he's been more closely-connected to the fraternity. But until a few years ago we've always gotten together at least a couple of times a year for fishing trips, golf, dinners, or just visits here and there.

And like Saturday night, we always catch up on family, the fraternity, each other, and much else. And we fondly recall the many memories we share...

For reasons I've never understood, I've always needed people in my life who can tell me I'm a good man despite whatever others say and whatever happens in my life. Within AOL World, for example, it's often been great women like Lady Exec and Ladyhawg (and even at one time, Beth). And until they died, it was Mom and my real brother.

But since I was 20, it's also always been Erv and a couple of the other fraternity brothers I've been privileged to know as "brothers in the bonds" who have served that role. I guess that's what "lifelong friendships" really mean and why my fraternity has always been so important to me...